Double standards in sexism- On the Bed

Hey there,

So I have come to the realisation recently that a massive issue for me is the double standards in sexism. I am one of those people that aren’t for feminism or against it and I am also not for the male equivalent I am for humans and Humanism. I prefer this stance not only because feminism is a tarnished brush and ridiculed due to social perception and negative connotations but also because I don’t believe you can fight for equality with something that is gender specific.

Feminism had its place in bringing about the beginning of equality to establish women in the world as individual and capable beings in areas they were thought not to enter. In this day and age however instead of people closing the gap between sexism it can be looked at as taking a swing in the opposite direction and the “uplifting” oppression of men (do not get me wrong I am not saying this is entirely feminist fault).

Gender equality is an issue that is hard to fight or have a stance on because no matter what you do you’re wrong, or being misogynistic or misandrist it is an issue that needs to be addressed in equal terms treating each as individuals void of gender.

From a young age we develop these ideas about how men and women behave, what qualities make us different and what toys we should be playing with all of which attribute to our opinions and acceptance of activities of men and women when we are adults.

Have a think if there has been a time when you’ve seen someone doing something and thought they shouldn’t because it’s not what you perceive as appropriate for that gender? Don’t worry it doesn’t make you sexist its just the natural response based on our social learning.

We see these standards on television in advertising all over social media and even in our homes. So what can we do about it? Well in my opinion the HeforShe campaign was a great idea and also not having two separate teams, become one change the face of feminism and NOMAS (national organisation for men against sexism) and just have humanism the equal rights for all human beings? I think that could make a huge difference, creating a united front and inspiring people to unite with you instead of separating themselves from causes we should all be involved in. A great idea if anyone should think to really fire it up is a campaign enlightening the idea of humans all for one and one for all so we may support each other and work together void of our genders being identified as just a person with thoughts, opinions and great ideas.

If you have a differing opinion feel free to leave it below in a respectable fashion of coarse, if you have any other ideas on how we can approach this problem also leave them below I love new ideas.

-From my bed to your screen

Keep creating yourselves

Xx

Meeting Bam & Fuckface Unstoppable

 Hey Guys, this week I did something totally random and really out of
my comfort zone I went to a metal concert it was the concert of Fuckface Unstoppable and I met Bam Margera and the rest of the band.

I am not a metal kind of person and I have especially never been to a metal gig I didn’t think I would like the music and really only went because we got to do a meet and greet with bam however I found myself loving the vibe and really getting into the music. It isn’t going to be my everyday type of music though…

I have to say I didn’t like the venue It was tiny I have anxiety and hate crowds and small spaces so it was extremely daunting for me however I got through it with my partner by my side and had one of the best nights I have ever had.

11203184_10153374249157704_6072170840832231060_n On the way to the concert

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At the Concert

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Bam & Andy at the concert

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Bam and his Brother Jess after the show and my partner

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Everyone we got the meet :)

In a wrap up it was an incredible night and I am so glad I did something out of my comfort zone, the music and atmosphere were amazing and the opportunity to meet someone I adore was not explainable in words.

Keep creating yourselves and always take opportunities

xx

Dating Game| Change

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Hey Guys,

I thought jumping back in with a dating game post was a good way to go, this idea just hit me and that is my favourite way to write when ideas just pop into my head. I have a few little relationships things I want to talk about today, so strap in.

Today I wanted to talk about changing whether its for a boyfriend, a crush, a friend, your girlfriend or any partnership.
Physical aspects such as your weight or height or any aspect of you physically shouldn’t be impacted by a partner, as humans we have enough insecurities about our bodies with out the people we love and admire adding there critique.
this is a massive NO NO for me in relationships any of them even if its my best girlfriend because I have parts of my body I don’t like and the last thing I want is someone else to add to that. all the advice out there says to keep a positive perspective of yourself but that’s easier said that done right? well keeping people around you that have a positive perspective of you is a good starting point.

I have a best girlfriend she has an amazing body in my eyes, she is tall and gorgeous even though she’s just had a baby I think she still looks as fine as before. I am sure any one whose been through that experience has/had there own insecurities and so did she, but that isn’t the focus as her friend I am here to tell her how amazing she is. This girl does the exact same thing for me, I have insecurities about different parts of my body and she is there every time I notice to say but hey you have these amazing qualities about your self too and this makes you beautiful.
having positive friendships that build you up is #1 on my list.

sometimes our greatest critics are our families, I am sure a tonne of you out there have felt that your family are being over critical or there comments have made you feel like shit, It sucks especially cause there family and there supposed to support you, In this instance what I do is remind myself although its hurtful that its not their intention, majority of the time they want what is best and think that telling you is just what you need. [F.Y.I family members its not helpful] if you have a specific family member who is causing you some extra stress talk to them about it.
I had an uncle who used to pick on my weight he had the best intentions but conversations always left me feeling like I would never be successful or appealing to the opposite sex if I didn’t loose weight. I am still struggling daily to change that perspective and thanks to the positivity around me its working :)

Partners are like family your intimate with them you have to bear your insecurities to them and if I have learnt anything about dating it is that it can be the biggest ego boost or the worst hit your self esteem will take. It just has that power. When you get a partner they shouldn’t put down your physical or personality features and if they do think something is up then I would suggest to discuss it in a non critical manner. Since being with my boyfriend certain things have definitely changed, my own motivation and determination has changed but not once has he made me feel bad about my body.

about three weeks ago I was determined I was going to loose weight to be more appealing more successful (I fell in the rabbit hole) and I told him he had to train me make me work out everyday and diet me, he told me we would talk about it when I got here I’ve been here for two weeks and not once has he dieted me or told me I can not have any food I want, he hasn’t dragged me kicking and screaming to the gym and he has made me walk as much as possible over taking the bus, I myself have chosen to do small exercise sessions while he has been at appointments and he always tells me how beautiful intelligent and amazing I am in all the aspects of my life.
I have since climbed out of the rabbit hole and have been reminded of how I can and should be comfortable with me!! (bonus I’ve lost 2kgs and didn’t have a terrible time doing it)

sometimes change is what we want in ourselves, when we don’t like something we want to change it and that is okay no one should be telling you its not okay to do what makes you feel good, just as long as your doing it safely and are aware then who cares. Keeping a positive perspective is just as important as keeping positive people. Don’t compare yourself to other people because you are not them you are the talented unique and special individual YOU.

keep creating yourselves xo

[image sourced from Google]

Previously in Dating Games 

UPDATE

update time, Its my final weeks of my first semester of uni final exams coming up and three massive assignments due this week, I have been busy as hell and believe me it has kind of felt like hell for the last couple of weeks.

I am heading away in three weeks, for a couple of week holiday to penguin island and to see fuck face unstoppable and BAM which i am super excited about. let me tell you I am ready for a holiday.

there is some cool stuff coming up, i am at uni today and i wore high heeled boots and now my feet really hurt!!!!

ooh i have a current obsession known as tell em steve dave podcast shit is unreal!!!

not much else to tell you all,

keep creating yourselves

xx

Obsessive confusion

Hey guys,

How many of you have been in a situation that you have found unbearably confusing where you go around in circles in your head trying to make a decision, it could be the least complicated decision like what to wear to class the next day, or how your going to write the intro to your English assignment, to whether you want to ask your crush out or not, to something as complex as a love triangle or struggling with your internal feelings void of circumstance.

No matter the issue or level of complexity we have all been in this kind of situation where consequences, actions and alternatives are running through our heads on repeat until eventually we drive our self crazy and throw in the towel on the whole situation.

Now that everyone can relate add a whole five weeks of psych study on top of the already repetitive thoughts swirling around heading into what now looks like a cyclone in my head, because not only am I aware of my choices, consequences thoughts and behaviours I am also now acutely aware of where they come from, how they are stationed and what causes them (in theory anyway). I have all these extra reasoning tools and justification options to explain or justify the choices I make, and whilst I am in the process of trying to justify all these action, or theories I am ripping my internal psych and personality to pieces.

Leading to a downward spiral that resulted in an outburst of tears and misunderstanding and sobbing and yelling to a very patient boyfriend, which isn’t really helpful, when it comes to making decisions, so here I am sitting at Uni getting my head filled with a shit load of different ways of looking and evaluating a situation that have actually left me more lost and running to my best friends house as soon as possible.

If you have any tips tricks or ways to work out tough decisions that are obsessing in your head, let me know in the comments?

Keep creating yourself

xx

Hello again 17

It’s a bright stinking hot saturday and I figured hey why not
lay under the fan and chat to the computer…

Yesterday I caught up with a friend that I have known since I was about 16,
our friendship was a whirlwind from meeting to instantly becoming best friends
we were almost inseparable, when we met I was on the coast just visiting
and ended up spending a whole week of my two week holiday with her,
and then making a life changing decision not long after that to move back to the coast.

fast forward through our friendship and at 17 I moved in with her and my boyfriend at the time,
to an apartment in surfers paradise not knowing that it would be something that literally changed me.

living together was a blast we were all loving it, then my boyfriend at the time and I split up,
yet he continued to live with us (that didn’t end so well) and so things were interesting to say the least,

then some of our mates moved in so there was five of us in the one apartment, it got loud and fun a little blurry at times,
but hey 17 year olds living together what else could you expect,
although these people were friends at the time or people I haven’t spoken too since, I realised when talking to my friend
that they will always be the people that changed my perspective on several things.

1. relationships and committment

2. Family in the essence you can make your own

3. a hangover

4. a seriously good cup of coffee changes everything

5. who you are at 17 won’t be who you are in 4 years time, but parts of you will be the same

one of the friends I lived with was well and truly wise beyond his years
and things happen now with my job or my education that really throw me back to that time
or to things that he said that really impacted how I view certain aspects of the world,

I have to thank all the experiences and adventures I had for all the awesome lessons I have learnt and will continue to learn forever.

family

remember,

keep creating yourselves.

xx

On the bed-Cross roads

Have you ever reached a point in your life or in a portion of your life that you just don’t know what to do anymore, where you’re going? You had everything all mapped out and then out of nowhere that’s not the road you want to go down, that is how I am feeling right now.

 

Last year I had this plan and I had everything mapped out the way it was going to go and how I was going to get there and in the last two weeks I have found myself hating parts of that plan cutting them left right and centre, my heart just isn’t in it all the things that we’re working before aren’t working now. I don’t really understand this position because I don’t even exactly know what I want at the moment I just seem to know what I don’t want, which isn’t really being helpful.

 

I am not an overly negative person I like to live off vibes and feelings around me but lately I have been feeling different kinds of vibes, I have started different things in my life and I can feel little parts of me changing and developing as I am faced with different situations and yet I feel like some of the people around me aren’t growing or changing with me, or that they aren’t changing at all may actually be the underlying problem.

 

Everything is really new for me at the moment, exciting and demanding with university and the qualification I am trying to get things are tightly stretched and any time I can have to myself to do things I like is a gift which Is rare at the moment, back to the issue, I really am confused about how I am feeling right now because I keep changing my mind on the end result of what specific area I would like to go into, what foods I really don’t like, how I feel about the colour blue and what style I am going for, all of these things seem trivial I know but its right down to the classes my mind is changing every couple of minutes to new things I want to try and then reasons I can’t do those things and even in the relationships I have with people, these things are rushing through my head and changing rapidly and it feels like all that planning and mapping was really just a waste of time because I am back in wavy unknown waters were I am paddling to find a place where I can stand catch my breath and then paddle some more until I find that right wave to ride home and finish the day.

 

So now that I have rambled about being completely lost in the sea of my thousand mile an hour thoughts, you guys should let me know how you cope when your feeling a little stressed/confused or lost in life?

 

From my bed to your screen- until next time

Keep creating yourselves

xx

Social Experiment

hey there everyone,

so I am working on assessment that has to do with physical attraction and of coarse personality but I need a hand working on the physical attractiveness portion.

below are pictures of two fine celebrities if you would like in the comments please select which one you find more attractive this goes for men and women as I am measuring changes in standards.

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on the left you have Ian Somerhalder & on the right you have Channing Tatum.

I am also asking this question on facebook, instagram and twitter.. feel free to join in the fun and thank you :)

keep creating yourselves

xx

I want to be prime minister

Originally posted on KANNELISE :

Hey guys,

A lot of you may have already heard that here in Aus there has just been a situation that apparently warranted non stop media attention, it has also over flowed social media platforms and every body seems to have their opinions on the matter. I have watched this turn into its own cyber storm over the last day or so and divided opinions are being voiced and debated. Out of this has even come the trending hash tag #illridewithyou which is about keeping every day life safe for innocent individuals that may be targeted due to religious attire. I personally believe this trend may have been sparked to try and prevent another situation such as the Cronulla Riots I have linked to wikipedia for reference if you are unsure what happened there.

I am generally proud to live in Australia and I am Australian you know how I…

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